Adjusting My Attitude

It's been a few days since I've been on the blog. I thought I should layoff after I read my last post because, I was sounding like a whiner. I prefer to not have that label. I prefer gratitude  guy, someone that's extremely grateful for all the blessings I've received in my life. I watched 20/20 last night, and part of the show was low incomes in the country. In one segment this man was commuting 80 miles one way to go to work. He started by bicycle at 5:30 am and had multiple bus connections. I told Donna if we had to do that, we'd probably cry and moan each and everyday. He was just wanting to be a good father and husband and provide for his family.There was a bunch of political issues with the show that I won't touch in this blog! Back on track, I'm grateful they found the infection when they did.

In hospital long enough to start a beard!

In the above picture I'm pissed, disappointed, scared, and tired. I gave myself a good talking to. I think I'm alright now. I need to get rid of this infection, and heal up so I can get some exercise in. No exercise at all is killing me a little each day in my opinion.

Before the hardware was removed I had a CT scan to map the exact location of the leads. I was told with that data and previous 3D model that they could pin point the exact location again without my help. I'm hoping that means they can knock me out for the reinsertion of the hardware.

I've been home for five days taking high powered antibiotics learning about some side effects the hard way. For example on the way home the first night we made a stop at the Dollar General. I get out of the car and go in, and make it to the bread isle before feeling fuzzy, grey and going down to my knees. I bounce up, no damage,although a little stunned, and go sit in the car. The next day I confirm by email that the drugs was probably the cause. I have to have blood drawn weekly for kidney function tests and have my Picc line dressing changed. What a hassle! There I go, whining again.

Had some visitors this weekend. My lifelong friend Beverly Johnson Watson, her mother and loyal companion Hedi came by the house for a quick visit. Hedi is the lighter Shepard in the back. My Bellla up front.

Today a flying buddy/boss from the Air Force, John (Box) Elder with his lovely bride came by for a few hours. It was good to see everyone! Social media can only do so much you know!

Terrible Day

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Today I had a little setback. I found out I have an infection. That's nothing to take lightly.I had complained about a stiff neck and the dr was observing me. I had sent him a half dozen pics. A small spot on my head they pressed on, and it opened up.Then he pressed on the side of my head, and it was quite tender. The odd thing is when he pressed on the Neurotransmitter,it wasn't sore, and it had quite a bit of infection on it. They drained blood from me to use with cultures, to narrow the antibiotic down.When I come home, I'll be on a pic line to finish the course of treatment, over the next couple months.Not helping my cause!

What words do you use to describe how you feel when they've just told you the medal pieces we've worked to put in you the last few weeks have got to be removed? Devastating comes to mind. January 5th was supposed to be a happy day,the first day to the rest of my life, a new beginning,starting over. Do you see how vulnerable we are in this life? My day turned to shit in less than 30 secs with life decisions to be made with it. I thought how unfair is this. Remember that 2 to 3% I told you about. Well, lucky me. My head looks like a baseball in spring training.(you know how it's clean with bright red stiches.

As I sit in Vanderbilt for my fourth night, taking antibiotics, I want to go home! All my vitals are good. I understand why I'm here,waiting on the cultures to grow so we know which one to attack when we go home. I just want to go home and morn this,were we can move on. Notice I said "we". I haven't given enough credit to Donna. She's across the room with me sleeping on a hard fold out couch. She's been with me from the beginning,and I wouldn't have lived this long without her and the girls love,and support. My girls are the greatest, both have graduated from UT. Amanda has a degree in business with a minor in Spanish, that she acquired from study abroad program. Morgan is staying on at UT for more punishment in grad school of speech therapy.

Hopefully a better week!